Squirrels Sharing Paradise.

I am so glad I keep my post cards. lol

A police officer sees a man driving around with a pickup truck full of Squirrels. He pulls the guy over and says...
"You can't drive around with squirrels in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."
The guy says "OK"... and drives away.
The next day, the officer sees the guy still driving around with the truck full of squirrels, and they're all wearing sun glasses. He pulls the guy over and demands...
"I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo yesterday?"
The guy replies...
"I did . . . today I'm taking them to the beach!"

Father Son Hunting Trip

A father and son went hunting together for the first time.
The father said "Stay here and be very QUIET. I’ll be across the field."

A few minutes later, the father heard a blood curdling scream and ran back to his son.

"What’s wrong?" the father asked. "I told you to be quiet."

The son answered" "Look, I was quiet when the snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck."
"But when the two squirrels crawled up my pant legs and said, should we eat them here or take them with us?"
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Not a word out of you my friend!!!

Important Questions:

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant? -- George Carlin

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? -- George Carlin

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? -- George Carlin

Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? -- George Carlin

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When is a pig a pig?

Once upon a time there were three little pigs. The straw pig, the stick pig, and the brick pig.
One day this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pigs house and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did!
So the straw pig went running over to the stick pig's house and said "Please let me in, the wolf just blew down my house." So the stick pig let the straw pig in.
Just then the wolf showed up and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." And he did!
So the straw pig and the stick pig went running over to the brick pigs house and said," Let us in, let us in, the big bad wolf just blew our houses down."
So the brick pig let them in just as the wolf showed up. The wolf said " I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down." The straw pig and the stick were so scared! But the brick pig picked up the phone and made a call.
A few minutes passed and a big, black stretch limo pulls up. Out step two massive pigs in pin striped suits and fedora hats. These pigs come over to the wolf, grab him by the neck and beat the living crap out of him. Then one of them pulled out a gun and fired killing the wolf. Then they got back into their limo and drove off.
The straw pig and stick pig were amazed! "Who the heck were those guys?" they asked.
"Those were my cousins from Jersey -- the Guinea Pigs."

lol

Happy Monday !!!

WHY ME?

We all have such days when we ask ourselves this question.

We like to lay blame on others for our troubles instead of seeing the situation for what it is.

I never read Job and came across it and said to myself : "Yes. This sounds right."

So here is Job's Story.

Job 1 (New International Version)

Job 1

Prologue

¹ In the land of Uz there lived a man whose name was Job. This man was blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil. ² He had seven sons and three daughters, ³ and he owned seven thousand sheep, three thousand camels, five hundred yoke of oxen and five hundred donkeys, and had a large number of servants. He was the greatest man among all the people of the East.

⁴ His sons used to take turns holding feasts in their homes, and they would invite their three sisters to eat and drink with them. ⁵ When a period of feasting had run its course, Job would send and have them purified. Early in the morning he would sacrifice a burnt offering for each of them, thinking, "Perhaps my children have sinned and cursed God in their hearts." This was Job's regular custom.

Job's First Test

⁶ One day the angels ^a]">[a] came to present themselves before the LORD, and Satan ^b]">[b] also came with them. ⁷ The LORD said to Satan, "Where have you come from?"
Satan answered the LORD, "From roaming through the earth and going back and forth in it."

⁸ Then the LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil."

⁹ "Does Job fear God for nothing?" Satan replied. ¹⁰ "Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. ¹¹ But stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face."

¹² The LORD said to Satan, "Very well, then, everything he has is in your hands, but on the man himself do not lay a finger."
Then Satan went out from the presence of the LORD.

¹³ One day when Job's sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brother's house, ¹⁴ a messenger came to Job and said, "The oxen were plowing and the donkeys were grazing nearby, ¹⁵ and the Sabeans attacked and carried them off. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!"

¹⁶ While he was still speaking, another messenger came and said, "The fire of God fell from the sky and burned up the sheep and the servants, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!"

¹⁷ While he was still speaking, another messenger came and said, "The Chaldeans formed three raiding parties and swept down on your camels and carried them off. They put the servants to the sword, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!"

¹⁸ While he was still speaking, yet another messenger came and said, "Your sons and daughters were feasting and drinking wine at the oldest brother's house, ¹⁹ when suddenly a mighty wind swept in from the desert and struck the four corners of the house. It collapsed on them and they are dead, and I am the only one who has escaped to tell you!"

²⁰ At this, Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship ²¹ and said:
"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
and naked I will depart. ^c]">[c]
The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away;
may the name of the LORD be praised."

²² In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.

Footnotes:

1. Job 1:6 Hebrew the sons of God
2. Job 1:6 Satan means accuser .
3. Job 1:21 Or will return there

New International Version (NIV)

Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica

and what good is it if we can't laugh at ourselves, eh?....

A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section.

The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for.

The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."

After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-piolet that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beatiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."

The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss.

"I told her first class isn't going to Detroit."

The Dancer Danced......Or Did She?

The Dancer.

One leg is planted firmly on the ground while the other is lifted.
Examining this picture closely, will relate to you the fact that raised leg could be either
the left or the right leg.
We cannot quite be sure.
It is how our brain perceives it to be.
Most people I’ve asked, see it as the right leg.

The same with words.
We have words like
Truth
Innocence
Lies
Justice
Peace
Love
Dance etc…..
What do they all mean?
These words do not exist, in the same temperance with say, a word like chair or a person.
You can’t see, touch, feel, taste, smell, truth for example.

We give meaning to words such as these, from our interpretation and understanding of them.
We argue and fight between each other, because our interpretation and understanding of these words is different.
A word like chair , water, tree, requires no language.
If you point to a tree, people understand it’s a tree.

If we were to read Nietzche, who is a nihilist,
dictionary meaning:
total rejection of established laws and institutions.
anarchy, terrorism, or other revolutionary activity.
total and absolute destructiveness, esp. toward the world at large and including oneself: the power-mad nihilism that marked Hitler's last years.
Philosophy. .
an extreme form of skepticism: the denial of all real existence or the possibility of an objective basis for truth.
nothingness or nonexistence.
(sometimes initial capital letter) the principles of a Russian revolutionary group, active in the latter half of the 19th century, holding that existing social and political institutions must be destroyed in order to clear the way for a new state of society and employing extreme measures, including terrorism and assassination.
annihilation of the self, or the individual consciousness, esp. as an aspect of mystical
experience.),

He would say: “Jesus says, I am truth.” He interprets this to mean that truth is discovered within yourself, by the meaning you give to it and this is obtained through the life you lead.
We create it, to to keep ourselves grounded . Truth is the house we built to live in, where we feel safe, secure and therefore powerful.
The safer we feel, the more powerful we are.
Man has a desire for power but he also has fear (absence from power)

To gain power, we give ourselves self imposed laws like morals ethics and values, to obtain self control.

POWER = SELF IMPOSED MORALS = SELF CONTROL = POWER

You see this going full circle in that the more self control you have, the more powerful you are and this then, makes you happier.
(Today we see unhappiness because people do drugs,drink and find excuses to lose self control)
The more you resistlosing self control, using the self imposed morals, the more power you have over your life and as you continue to "overpower" yourself,
cause that's hard to do, you become a Super man...............And closer to Jesus and God.

Having said this, we go back to the question of the Dancer and truth and
the lifted leg, is it ............the left ........or the right?

Only the Dancer knows.

We are also under the mistaken assumption that all men want to be Supermen, since they want "rights".

The question, inside the labyrinth of interpretation is, do they?