Showing posts with label style. Show all posts
Showing posts with label style. Show all posts

Monday, March 8, 2010

Mamma Mia.

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People are individuals.

The only time you can say people are social, are in history books where it is written that people fight together in wars, walk together in parades,
sing together in rock and roll band parks,
pray together in a mosque or temple or church, and study together in schools,
But this is where it stops.

When you see a whole bunch of cars driving on city streets, you are not looking at social people.

You are looking at individuals and this makes all the difference.

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A person behind the wheel of a car holds, the wheel in a 10 and 2 position and stares straight ahead.

They don’t have necks that turn.

The vision is limited to what is ahead.

There is no left, no right, even when they turn on a corner.

They fail to make eye contact with either a pedestrian or another car because this would mean they would lose their right of way.

Why would they give you, right of way?

You do not need a right of way.

They are on the street behind the wheel and they are the most important driver out there.

What’s more, they wear the biggest of glasses to make sure you can see their huge eyes are not looking at you, thanks to the huge thick lenses

So looking into their eyes, you can tell that even if the law says you have right of way….. you don’t.
I often wonder what would happen if two such thick lensed,big eyed people,ever met on a street corner.
One would have to be driving faster than the other one to avoid a collision and a lot of God’s help would be required since the Devil would find it
amusing to have them crash.

Driving is not a social activity.
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ICBC shows people driving under the influence of drugs.

The car becomes a Mattel toy in their hands and nano technology has improved to a tremendous degree because this car requires no steering.
It is equipped with impressive high speed, intelligence to know where to drive and howto avoid accidents.

This is where the “no such thing as an accident” ICBC teaches applies. I mean how could there be such a thing as an accident when there is an individual driving a high tech car that does all the thinking?
I mean if the car doesn’t think then On Starr can control it from its' satellite.

This certainly gives one lots of time to drink,smoke,pot up,
talk on the phone, watch tv ,play the drums and even do the Michael Jackson Moon walk on the front windows to the swing of the wind shield wipers.

Its all individual, because where one can do it, the other can’t.

The third type of individual that drives is the star struck one.
You know,the ones whose head is in the clouds.
Whatever they are thinking about, it certainly is not about driving
It might be about the fight they had last night, or the love they made last night or the break up they are planning or
What is that guy/gal thinking about me right now. or Gosh I need a smoke sooo bad Where are my patches?

Or they are pretending to be tough ol 50 cent or sexy Tiger woods…….playing golf?


Mercedes sits with her lipstick and mirror.

The Avenger, with the beady eyes, looks to sneak up on your ass.

The Hummer, sitting comfy, low keyed, full of himself, hums, singing like a slow engine , in very low key Baby…. Baby.........

Kia , sitting between them somewhere, is twittering away and the Rabbit lover turbos between them all.

Another type of individual takes on their car features. These people are similar to people who buy Bobbsey Twin Dogs.

Can you imagine dog, owner and car look alikes?

Get this

MUSTANG! With a horse faced owner and an English bull terrier
or
a Dodge RAM sitting with and old guy with waxed hair around his ears and poodle to match.

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This is just a small sample of the individuals that are out there driving on the streets,behind wheels of cars.

The Rest of us, untalented, having no life, people on the road,

who spend most of our time watching them,in fear for our lives,

are individuals too and I must say, without bias, the best of the bunch.

We fit into both the individual arena and the social arena.

We are somewhere in between the Dr Jekylls and the Mr Hydes,

In between the Rams, the Kias and the Hummers.


We are the Volvos and the Vans and the Station wagons

But wait. It’s not that simple.

We can camouflage, by souping them up and when we put on them dark glasses……

Watch Out.... Mama's on the loose.
:)



J

Friday, May 22, 2009

Men Are Happy Say Jealous Women

WHY ARE MEN, NEVER DEPRESSED?



Men Are Just Happier People

What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be President.

You can never be pregnant.

You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal.

You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Same work, more pay.




Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks.

A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes..

Everything on your face stays its original color.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs lo ok.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

What woman can handle all this? lol

AND

Men who enjoy reading this?....................

WHO'S YA DADDY? Ah hunh ah hunh! lol

(click)

LYRICS

Slade Mama Weer all Crazee now Lyrics:I don't want to drink my whisky like you do

I don't need to spend my money but still do

Don't stop now a c-'mon Another drop now c-'mon I wanna lot now so c-'mon

That's rightthat's right

I said Mama but we're all crazy nowI said Mama but we're all crazy nowI said Mama but we're all crazy now.

And you told me fool firewater won't hurt me

And you tease me and allmy ladies desert me

Don't stop now a c-'mon

Another drop now c-'monI wanna lo now so c-'mon

That's rightthat's right

I said Mama but we're all crazy now I said Mama but we're all crazy now

I said Mama but we're all crazy now.

I don't want to drink mywhisky but still do I had enough to fill up"H" Hill's left shoe

Don't stop now a c-'mon Another drop now c-'mon I wanna lot now so c-'mon

That's rightthat's rightI said Mama but we're all crazy nowI said Mama but we're all crazy nowI said Mama but we're all crazy now.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

From Here to Maturity

I went to the liquor store to buy a bottle of wine.
Another woman was standing in front of me and the cashier asked her for her ID.

When it came to my turn, she didn't ask me.

Now that is kinda a bummer, I thought, when they stop asking you for your ID.
So, I went home and changed and came back to buy another bottle of wine.

This time she asked me for my ID. :):):)

This is what I looked like.:)





After checking my ID though.........She gave me THE look....

I must have looked really young lol :)