Scalawag

A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?"
He replied: "Yes, losing your vision."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

With head held high
He jumped over brush
Which scattered on the forest floor
The melting snow so warm and fresh
Kept his skin aglow

I wondered what he was up to now
Alone under a starry sky
A playful rogue, a scalawag
One looks at with a smile.

He trips , he falls as
His pants fall down
While he charges made up villains
His sword flies high and hits the soil
In between, soft snow, caresses.

But the rascal takes no time at all
To rise and scamper yonder
Enfant terrible! his Mom would call
When he sneaks off like a shyster.

And As I walked along the path
I heard his paling thunder
Voila Monsieur! En garde! Adieu!
Now I have all your treasure!

Ha! Ha!
You thought you could get away
Deceitful knave of Wiltshire
And as he turned he saw me stare
At his wily ways and grandeur

And he tipped his hat
While his pants he held
With a gallant smile and laughter.
I'm off to meet another imp
Another black guard jug head.

I will turn them into crow bait
Along with their precious nags
For I am a scoundrel, rogue and hack
The one and ONLY
Scalawag of Wiltshire.

A Lady's Life

-------------------------------------------------------

One morning 3 South Alabama good old boys and 3 Yankees were in a ticket line at the Montgomery

train station heading to Auburn to watch the War Eagles play football.

The 3 Northerners each bought a ticket and watched as the 3 Southerners bought just one ticket among them.

"How are the 3 of you going to travel on one 1 ticket?" asked one of the Yankees.

"Watch and learn" answered one of the boys from the South.

When the 6 travelers boarded the train, the 3 Yankees sat down, but the 3 Southerners crammed into a bathroom

together and closed the door.

Shortly after the train departed, the conductor came around to collect tickets.

He knocked on the bathroom door and said, "ticket please." the door opened just a crack and a single arm emerged

with a ticket in hand. The Conductor took it and moved on.

The Yankees saw this happen and agreed it was quite a clever idea.. Indeed, so clever that they decided to do the

same thing on the return trip and save some money.

That evening after the game when they got to the Auburn train station, they bought a single ticket for the return trip

while to their astonishment the 3 Southerners didn't buy even 1 ticket

"How are you going to travel without a ticket?" asked one of the perplexed Yankees.

"Watch and learn", answered one of the Southern boys.

When they boarded the train the 3 Northerners crammed themselves into a bathroom and the 3 Southerners crammed

themselves into the other bathroom across from it.

Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Southerners left their bathroom and walked quietly over to the

Yankee's bathroom. He knocked on the door and said "ticket please".

There's just no way on earth to explain how the Yankees won the war
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One of the bloggers made a blog having to do with a good deed bracelet.
I thought it was a wonderful idea for teachers and parents especially to teach values and good behavior.

Every time your child does a good deed, he/she gets a bead.
If the bracelet is full then this is something they can be proud to wear and if they have more bracelets
even better. Then you can also hand out awards for the number of bracelets a child gets.
I guess Walmart would have kits with beads to do this project with students
I would have directed you to the blog itself but I lost it.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A hooded robber burst into a Texas bank and forced the tellers to load a
sack full of cash.

On his way out the door, a brave Texas customer grabbed the hood and pulled
it off, revealing the robbers face. The robber shot the customer without a
moment's hesitation.

He then looked around the bank and noticed one of the tellers looking
straight at him. The robber instantly shot him also. Everyone in the bank,
by now very scared, looked intently down at the floor in silence.

The robber yelled, " Well, did anyone else see my face?"

There are a few moments of utter silence in which everyone was plainly to
afraid to speak

Then, one old cowboy named Bill from Oklahoma tentatively raised his hand
and said,

"My wife got a pretty good look at you."
===================================================

I hope every one is safe back east with all these tornado and flood warnings.
We sure had enough of winter I think.